Sunday, December 8, 2013

Stop The Violence- Live and let live!!!

These days the news feed on my Facebook is just flooded with news against violence and abuse. There are many different kinds but the one that has caught my attention the most is violence against women. This is a topic which only a small fraction of population has been able to discuss freely. Now things are changing though and people are getting together to fight against the violence. So here goes my rants and thoughts about the most common violence around the globe, "Violence Against Women"

This in itself is a very sensitive topic, so I will try my best to pick my words carefully. As a woman coming from a developing Asian country, violence against women was seen as a normal everyday thing when growing up. Back in the days, women were scared to even discuss about it with their family. Domestic violence was the most prevailing kind and no body really cared how the woman (victim) felt. I know I'm using past tense but things have changed a lot now (hopefully). With many women being educated, they have come to realize that they too have the right to speak and fight against being abused.

Abusing women varies from the smaller ones like petting the back a little too often, or constant touching or caressing in a not so friendly manner, to big/brutal ones like beating or raping. No matter how big or small, being abused is the worst thing that can ever happen to anyone.

To be honest, a woman will have been abused even just once at any stage of her lifetime. This is a sad and ugly truth with some incidents being told in open while the others just buried inside for long and finally taken to the grave with the victim. Confessing about such events can be very daunting and especially in the least developed countries, even worst, where the victims can be accused of provoking the abuser.

So why does it happen? Why don't SOME (before I get accused of generalizing) men understand that it's not right to treat women like their personal belonging? No, you can't touch a woman without her permission! The most common place where small abuses occur is public transportation. If the bus is crowded enough, you will be surprised how men use legs of a woman sitting next to them as their handstand and then just move it around in a really sick manner (or it just starts from there!). This happens! And then there are some men who can undress women with their eyes, literally! The stare in itself is an abuse, believe it or not.

I don't understand why these men do it though. What the hell do they think they are doing? Do they think its normal to randomly feel a stranger's body out in public like that? Dude learn how to calm your hormones. Even thinking about this makes me sick to the point of throwing up. Why is it so hard to control yourself? There are many men who have self control and are good at respecting women, so what is wrong with this group of sick men?

The sad part is when the abuser is from your family. We all have that one perverted uncle or cousin who takes up every opportunity possible to come close to you. All those stares in inappropriate areas and those never ending hugs and holding hands and what not. Its so hard to understand these men. They have a loving wife or partner and yet again they have this need to get this perverted satisfaction from someone else. Why?

No matter how much we think we can understand the pain of the victim, we really can't! The emotions are too deep, I'm sure. Even the smallest abuse can shake a woman up and disturb her for a long time, so I can only imagine how those women feel who are brutally abused and in worst cases by multiple men at once. That is just too inhuman.

The more we talk about it, the more saddening it gets. However, its great to see the changes now. The public response to Delhi rape case was pretty impressive and surprising at the same time. There were so many people ( and not just women) who stood up against the brutal abuse. I hope there will be a day when stories about abusing women will just be history. We can only be hopeful if nothing.

We can only pray for the better days when these sick men will understand the value and start respecting women. I wish there was a way to make them realize that all women are the same. So just because you're not blood-related to them doesn't mean you can carry on with your disgusting acts with them. Learn to respect women and in general everyone because everyone has the right to live a free life without the fear of being abused!

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