Saturday, November 21, 2015

This too shall pass!!!

Have you ever felt like quitting everything and just running far away where no body knows you so you could start everything all over again? Or wishing something terrible like an attack or anything deadly would happen to you so all your suffering would come to an end? Most people fear death, but have you wondered about the portion of population who fear the life that they are living instead? While some people pray for a long, healthy life, others could just be praying for it to come to an end.


"This is just a phase.. she will get over it!"
"Oh, he is just over thinking, give him 2 days and he will come around."
"She was literally laughing like 2 mins ago, I don't think she is that depressed."
"It's not that big of a deal, you just need a few drinks."

Hitting the rock bottom! Worst feeling in the world. And every person in this planet has their own idea of hitting the rock bottom. Hence, the variations of suggestions and advises. At the end of the day, no one knows the real depth of the pain better than the person going through itself. 

I know this is all a dark-twisty talk that most people like to avoid. But believe it or not, depression is not just a phase. I have never been super depressed in my life to the point where I had to seek professional help, so I won't be able to go that far. But I have definitely reached the point where I was so close to getting into depression but somehow got lucky to manage to pull it together before it went that far. 

I remember the first time I hit the rock bottom. I had never been in that serious of a relationship before. Relationships had always been about crushing for few days, flings for other few weeks, followed by break up. But finally being in a relationship that meant the world to me and then it coming to an end being back stabbed the shit out of myself was the worst experience I ever had. That was a horrific experience for me. Then again, I would feel obligated to be normal in front of people. Having an extrovert/happy go lucky kind of personality just made things worst. But at the end of the day, laying in bed being forced to accept the reality and face the sad demons within would make me the weakest. I would literally find myself waking up in the middle of the night from the nightmares of my ex, or sobbing in public restrooms, or just staring at nothing for hours. This went on for over three months straight. Being completely normal one minute and then then turning into a pathetic soul another became a part of my life. I was so close to going into depression. Somehow along the line, I managed to pull it together and come through. Even to this date, thinking about the whole thing in general gives me chills.

I am not going to bore you with any more of my experiences here. It just sucks to be going through a heartbreak no matter what the reason is. And it definitely isn't always about "boy-drama", if you are mistaken.

I am not even sure why I decided to write about this. My head is a gloomy mix of emotions and I guess I just wanted to spit the words out. To those people straddling along the line of loneliness/depression, please find a way to pull it together and don't quit. I know the feeling when you feel like no one in the world understands you.. that's because it is true, no body does. I have had experience of calling my best friend crying my eyes out and by the time I disconnected the call, my tears would be gone but the emptiness would remain. Because no matter how hard she tried to understand me, she couldn't. And its normal. No one else knows better about the trigger that pushes you into the gloominess than yourself. And there is no perfect word one can tell you to make you feel better. While I was going through this, people around me might never even had slightest clue about it. That is the thing about this, it seems unreasonable because "it seems to be all in your head".

So, if you are feeling sad, down, or lonely, know that you are not the only one. There could be thousands of people going through the same emotions and just masking it with a plastered smile, just like you are. And just like everyone else, you need to be strong too and not quit no matter how tempting it is. Find something to distract your mind. I personally like going for long walks, even when it's freezing cold out. ;) There has to be something that soothes your soul, find it. No matter what the situation is, once it's over, there are glorious days awaiting you. Just keep chanting the mantra "This too shall pass"..

This is a mere attempt of me talking to myself to not quit.. If you are riding the same boat, hope this helped a little! :)

Saturday, September 26, 2015

Being Single Sucks?!?

Every morning I wake up, I look in the mirror and ask myself, what is wrong with me? Why is it that I am single. Maybe there is something wrong with me? Maybe it is my imperfect face or could it be my body? Being 20 something, independent, and living a good life, I feel like something is not right. Why? Because I am single. Being single is the new "not-cool" thing and sadly enough, I made it to the list of the outcasts. 

So yesterday, I had this huge craving for Indian food and I wanted to go out and eat. But then, I realized have no companion to go with. After debating for sometime, I decided to go eat in a restaurant by myself. My my, I do own a pair eh? I walked into the restaurant and let the hostess know that I was dining by myself. Well, obviously, she asked me twice and then looked at me like I was some crazy person. Well, yeah I deserved it! Restaurants are meant for only people who have a companion to go with, right? Boy, speak about committing a crime.

As I sat down, the server asked me twice if there was anyone joining me. Then the bus boy also felt the need to come back and double check the fact that I would be dining alone. I just smiled and nodded yes. But inside I was shaking. Why? Because I am single. I should have been at home feeling pathetic about my lonely life, watching some sad movies on Netflix and binge eating junks. After all that's what single people are supposed to do. Feel lonely, sad, and pathetic about life. They should be banned from all the public places and going out and stuff you know. They don't deserve to lead a normal life because they are single, eh?

I really hope you guys caught the sarcasm. If not, here is an explanation. The story that I shared above is true and happens to me more often than not. It's just sad to see how people feel the need to pity single people. I just don't understand why enjoying your own company is an alienated idea to people. I just wish people could understand that "being single by choice" is a thing.

Whenever I have conversation with people about relationships, I always have to explain the reason behind me being single. And its even more annoying when people think that I am trying to make myself feel better by making myself believe that I am happy to be single. Being single is fun. I am not making it up. I have been in relationship before and I know what it feels like. I would be lying when I say I don't have my down days. Yes, some days I do wish I had someone to share that romantic relationship with. But if I am not mistaken, people in relationship do have such down days as well. There are times when you do wish you were single too. It's just the same. Just that few minutes/hours of pondering and then  you're back in your normal life. It's the same for me too, so you don't get to judge me!

This is not only about people who are single versus who are in relationship. This is rather against the idea that "you need a companion to enjoy your life". I am sorry that you feel bad for me but I don't. I honestly enjoy going out to restaurant to eat by myself, going shopping on my own, or long walks, or movies, and the likes. I don't feel the necessity of having someone to tag along with me. I am sorry if that makes you uncomfortable or if you don't believe it but it is what it is! 

This is to all the people who are single and actually making the most out of it - please continue doing so. You are not single because there is something wrong with you. You are single because you want to be. This is to you guys who are not ready to settle down for less just because you think you are among the outcasts for not having someone by your side. Yes, you can be single, independent, happy, and live your life loving yourself and there is nothing wrong with that. Cheers to you all!! :)

Monday, September 14, 2015

The day I felt ashamed of calling myself feminist!!

To (especially) all the modern day/keyboard/borderline feminists (Or however you'd like to address yourself), and then everybody else, I highly encourage you all to read the book "I am Nujood, Age 10 and Divorced". IT IS A MUST READ. I shall tell you why in just a moment.


I still remember the day I bought this book. It was not so long ago when I took a walk down to Barnes and Nobles and was just browsing around the aisles when I came across this book. Something about the little girl's face grabbed my attention and the look of innocence compelled me to buy it. When checking it out with the cashier, little did I know about all the ordeal that this young soul had to go through and the impact that would leave on me. 

I know I have never done book review before, so please ignore my amateurism. The book (non-fiction) is about Nurjood Ali, a girl who was forced by her father to get married at the age of 9. The struggle that she went through after getting married will make your stomach churn and tear up your eyes. At such a tender age, she is married off to a guy who is three times older than she is. [While reading the book, I had a picture of monster in my mind every time this guy would be mentioned.] The guy and his family members (mostly his mother) make her life a living hell until one day she just decides she can't take it anymore and runs away from her home to the court to seek justice. 

Looking at the title or flipping through few pages will make it seem like the story is straight up obvious. Well, in a way it is, but what stands out most is this little girl's strength which makes this book a must-read! I can never imagine being in her place and deciding to just run away one day to seek justice by myself. Kudos to her. Also to her lawyer Shada Nasser for never leaving her side and helping her get the justice she deserved. This world needs more strong females like Nujood to bring an end to the domestic violence that women face.

I spent many sleepless nights after reading this book. I would just stare at the ceiling and think about Nujood. I really want to meet this girl in person to just observe her, or hear her speak, or even give her a tight hug. This girl is an epitome of strength. In my opinion, this story is a tight slap to all the modern day feminists, including myself, who think feminism has come a long way. (No offense). By that, I am not tying to include all the feminists in the world. But most of us do think we have taken a leap forward when it comes to feminism.

Yes, many women in different corners of the world have come a long way. We have freedom to speech, vote, etc etc and we have fought all along to be able to lead a normal life. But how about millions of other women/females like Nujood who are struggling for their basic human rights? If we go and ask them if they think feminism has come a long way, I am sure they will have a different opinion. I am not saying we should overlook all the positives and focus on the negatives. That is not the message I'm trying to convey. All I am trying to say is, if you are a feminist, you don't get to be fully satisfied by only looking at the progress that women in your community/nation are making. Feminism should include everyone regardless of any boundaries. If even 10 girls/women are going through the struggle that Nujood had to go through, then feminism is still where we started from. There are women who are still treated like possessions. There are women who are still dying or living a horrible life in the name of dowry or various such absurd reasons. There are women who are still deprived of education and married off so young. Just because we are a little ahead in the race doesn't mean we leave the weak ones behind and run towards the finish line.

I know everything is easier said than done. My life just felt meaningless after reading the book. While there are some women living such a horrible life because of their gender, I am spending my time worrying about whether the purse that I am carrying matches the shoes that I am wearing. It's sad that I have not been able to do anything for these women and my reason being, "I don't have enough expertise on it." I just wish I could borrow some of the strength from Nujood and give up on all the luxury that I have access to and impute on my part in making this world a better place for all women.

As the saying goes, "Never say never", I am still hopeful that someday I will also have the strength like Nujood, to run away and hail that life-changing cab which helped her reach the freedom that she deserved.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Last day on planet Earth

"How would you feel if today was your last day?" I have been asking this question to myself over and over for the last few days.. I blame this on Facebook.. Why? Words of happiness or grief, news travel faster on Facebook than any other medium. And I feel like the word of untimely demises has been filling up my Facebook page like crazy!!! Some strangers and some known people. Whenever I see such posts, I always get this urge to go to that person's Facebook page and see what their last post was about. Forgive me if that is wrong but I always do,. Then I sit down and wonder, what would my last post be? Or what if today was my last day on this planet Earth.

Just think about it, none of these people saw/see it coming. If you go to their FB pages you will know. They are just living normal life like us, posting songs, status updates, and may be just blogs, and BAM, in a splits second their existence is gone. How weird is that? I just feel bad for the people associated with that person. Their better half or their loved ones, how will/do they cope with it? 

Us human beings, we are selfish. We always want more. We are never satisfied with whatever we have. More money, more fame, more friends, more power.. more than what we already have. I am not saying all of us don't, but most of us don't tend to appreciate what we already have. You may not have money enough to buy a house of your own or buy an empire for yourself, but hey, you made it through the day. While people out there are grieving over losing someone, you either are intact or your loved one is. That is also a big enough reason to be thankful or happy about. Or look at the things you already have. I am sure there is someone/somewhere out there wishing for the life that you are living.

Nobody gets or deserves EVERYTHING we want in life. Life would be perfect that way. We always have some short comings and that is life all about. Rather than being bitter about what we don't have, why don't we focus on what we already have? After all, there is one life to live, and do you want your last feeling to be something bitter or something filled with grudge?

I know it is all easier said than done, but then again nothing is impossible as they say. We can try by letting go of one bitter feeling each day and embracing a positive one instead. It's like letting go of a nasty addiction - it may be hard but it is not impossible. It all depends on how badly you want to give it up.It all depends on how positive you want your life to be. And it all depends on how badly you want your last post on Facebook to be something positive or full of satisfaction. And, it all depends on how gracious you want your last day on Earth to be.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Well Behaved Women Barely Make History

http://www.naijastories.com/2015/06/caged-3/

"Like a compass needle that points north, a man's accusing finger always finds a woman. Always.", Khaled Hosseini quotes in "A Thousand Splendid Suns"[I know I have used this quotation as an ending note on another blog also, happens to be my favorite]. I partially agree with this quotation. No offense to Mr. Hosseini, but I believe the pointing fingers are not only that of men but rather the whole society in general. I know you must be tired of reading, watching, hearing, and what not about feminism. So are we. We are also tired of writing, making, screaming, and finding ways to make our voices heard. We are also waiting for the day when we will finally get to stop all this and be in peace.

When it comes to feminism, there is a misconception that it directly involves men-hating. NO! Feminism is not about men hating. Feminism is also not about wanting more or less. Feminism for me is more about being treated like just another person than someone from the second gender. And I know there are millions of other women like me who can relate. 


I am writing this today on behalf of those women who are tired of being considered rebellious for seeking the freedom that they deserve. Or when things go wrong everything comes down to the conclusion of "because you are rebellious". It is ridiculous how everything can come down to us being "wild" or "carefree". Here is a story that I was debating whether I should share or not.. well whatever.. 


So, I was in this house party. There were a bunch of people, both men and women, drinking and having fun. Typical weekend I should say. So there is this guy that I've met a couple of times, def. not good friend. We are talking and then after a certain point he tries to get close to me to a point where it gets more than uncomfortable. Yes I should have slapped him or even kicked his ass. But I didn't because I froze. It felt weird, unseen, and unbelievable. Well all these details are not very important. What that guy tried to do was disgusting in itself, but what turned out to be more frustrating is how it became my fault for inviting all of it. It happened because I was drinking, or the cloth I wore, or the way I talked. Despite my straight up saying no to the guy, what stood out more was my personality that somehow "provoked" the guy. Hence, I invited it!!! 


When I got response from educated group of individuals going "You need to be careful and calm", I felt betrayed. This is what I don't get at all. What makes it necessary for me to be "careful" or "calm"? Is it just because I am a woman? I am as capable and independent as that guy or most men around. I was born the same way and will die the same way. So is just being "woman" enough for me to stop having fun and living my life the way I want? Why do I have to always watch my steps or my tongue in order to safe guard myself? Why do I have to learn to protect myself? Instead of teaching me to be "calm", "careful", "less wild", "civilized" and the likes why can't we teach these men to be "calm", "considerate", "respectful" and the likes? [Not all men of course, before I get accused of generalizing].


I understand that there are bigger rights women are fighting out on streets for. The recent one would be women asking for citizenship to be issued under mother's name back home. Don't get me wrong here, I do think that it is important. I hope it gets approved, if it hasn't already. But what I am more concerned about is, I may get to get my daughter issued a citizenship under my name, but will I be able to give her the life she deserves? Where she can go crazy and wild as her heart pleases without having all these fingers pointing towards her questioning her every move? She will get to vote for the person who will rule a state/country, but will she be able to walk in the dark alley at night in the same state/country without the fear of being pulled into the corner and raped? To me little things matter as much as the big ones. I would want a position in a political party if I get it with the respect I deserve. I would want equal pay if I feel it's worth the effort I put into it. 


I just wish this world didn't have so much of gender stereotypes going on. The more I think about it, the more depressing it gets. I may have all the rights protecting me in this place that I reside at the moment yet the society that surround keep reminding that I am a woman and just for than reason I need to always be careful and well behaved. But as the saying goes, "Well behaved women barely make history"and I am def. here to make one.. Cheers!! ;)


Monday, June 29, 2015

The smell

The smell, the touch, and the warmth,
All intact for quite some hours.
No sooner you walk out of the door,
I run to the window for one last glimpse
Watch you pull out of the driveway
Till you vanish out of the vicinity
The dust and the rubble, all settle down
Yet I stand frozen, with an unsetteled mind
Your disheveled self is all gone, and yet-
The smell, the touch, and the warmth,
All intact for quite some hours

Your skin on mine, and as you hold my hand
For a splits second, I see our souls align
Day to days, and weeks to months
The same sparks and yet the same cycle
Guilt sorrounds everytime I stand by the window
Resistant to turn around and face the four walls that sorround
Unable to proceed towards the reality inbound
You are a short-lived ecstacy or a nasty addiction
Killing me from within and making me wonder
Your disheveled self is all gone, and yet-
The smell, the touch, and the warmth,
All intact for quite some hours

Thursday, June 4, 2015

24 and Single.. Should I be worried?


Its been a while.. About time I get back in the grind.. And what can be a better comeback than announcing to the world about my relationship status.. tee hee ;) Well in today's world, it might not actually work out in my best interest. Being single is the new "not cool" trend these days!

One thing that I get a LOT these days - "24 and single?!?, Girl you're too old to be picky now!"

Not many people seem to get or understand the fact that there is such thing as "Single by choice". Today, I will walk you through the world of a single person.

- There is no one to split the bill/dinner with. While everyone on the table wants their checks together, you will be the only one asking for a separate check. Either go big and order the three course meal or enjoy your one-entree meal! ;)
- Being single means running all the errands on your own.. This includes unclogging bathroom, killing roaches, learning to zip up your dress on your own, fixing the light bulbs, assembling your own furniture, carrying all grocery bags on one take by yourself, changing the door knob on your own, and the likes.. whhewww!
- You're your own person. Moments of meltdowns or joy, there is no instant shoulder to lean on or jump into.
- Dinner dates, movies, concerts, etc. Either tag along, or be gutsy enough to be on your own, else stay at home.
- Looking for roomies in Craigslist.
- Plus 1 RSVP? ppffttt!!!

There are many more of these that I can't even think of right now. Single by choice means, knowing all of these and yet willing to be on your own!

Well there are as many perks also but let's not go there now. Being single may not be the easiest way of life but it is also not the toughest of all. It all depends on how much you want to compromise with yourself. I have been in that phase where all I wanted was to not be single so I went above and beyond trying to be in a relationship. But then, looking back I realize all I wanted was to be in the cool club.

As I spent my 24th birthday not so long ago, within four walls of my room (that I call home), eating a slice of frozen cake that I got from the nearby grocery store and sipping on the self-made screw driver, I realized that life is more about doing what you really want versus doing what is in the trend. I've forced myself to be in relationships for the fear of being single before but that night I realized that the loneliness was worth all the forced conjugal happiness.

This is to all those people who think they should be worried because they are twenty something and still single.... well guess what, you def. shouldn't be!! Being single takes a commitment of your own to make yourself happy and put yourself before anyone else.. You may be called arrogant or selfish but at the end of the day you are surviving on your own. You can survive in any corner of the world on your own. Also, age is just a number ;) And lastly, you are your own hero.. so pat yourself in the back.. go figure!!!!

Monday, April 27, 2015

Donate/Help/Pray For Nepal.. #Quake2015


Imagine you're on a carousel spending some quality time at the park with your family and the next thing you know, the world around you starts shaking as you, yourself, are spinning around. Imagine you're spending some quality time with your loved ones over some good lunch at home and the next thing know, the ground underneath starts shaking like crazy. Imagine you're leisurely walking hand in hand around town with your loved one and the next thing you know, the buildings around you start collapsing. Imagine you're enjoying the beautiful view and taking pictures of the city from the tallest historic building ever built, and next thing you know the building is collapsing on you... just imagine!

If just imagining the situations is enough to give us goosebumps, I can't even think how those people must have felt who were actually a part of these situations. Life is uncertain indeed. You must all be aware of the earthquake that took place in Nepal this Saturday, shaking up the whole nation as well as people all around the globe. It's sad that the after shocks are still ongoing. This devastation ended up taking away (and still taking) numerous lives, properties, historic buildings, and what not. The news was indeed very heart breaking, darkening, scary, and unbelievable to wake up to.

While our beautiful country is struggling to bounce back to the closest to being normal, it is very heart warming to see all the countries extending their helping hands by offering various kinds of help in the best ways possible that they are capable of giving. Looking at all those pictures really brought tears in my eyes. At times like these, the acts of generosity does remind that there is such thing as humanity. Us human beings, we are able to rise above everything and help each others in times of need. The act that stood out the best for me is India's PM Narendra Modi's involvement and interest in helping Nepal recover from this big crisis. He has walked one more mile by deciding to donate his one month's salary to the earthquake relief fund for Nepal. Kudos to this gentleman, bless his heart!

While countries from all over the world are donating, Nepalese from all over the world are fundraising, different nations are sending forces and other necessities, our country's elected officials have chosen to go MIA on us. I am not trying to bash anyone or create a negative environment here at such saddening moment, but despite the news of "denying help from Taiwan" and making comment about "Not needing support forces anymore in order to stop overcrowding", there isn't much in the news that I've heard from/about them. I see the locals carrying out different cleaning/support/fund raising/ medical support etc. campaigns on their own while the officials have chosen to be in their safe zone and not show up to get their hand dirty when needed. Let us all hope that they will find ways to manage helps being sent by different nations and rather make use of them wisely to tackle the crisis rather than rejecting them due to their lack of a plan of action. Also, let us hope that all these donations from all around the world will indeed be used to rebuild the beautiful country that has been shattered at the moment.

Other than that, lastly I would like to encourage people to donate however much you can to help Nepal try to bounce back to normal. I know there have been threats of hackers and scam pages, I understand the concern. I have chosen to post the link of "ANMN: Association of Nepalis in Minnesota" because I have been a part of this organization for long enough to trust their judgment. Follow the link where you will find a sub link to make the donation. The sub link was posted in the link for you to assess the organization and check it's credibility before you donate. (Just to clarify that it was not done for advertising purposes).

http://anmn.org/anmn/?page_id=114

So please people, no matter what organization you donate through, do no hesitate to donate. The idea of "Every penny counts" is proven right in this context. Every penny that you donate will help those people who have lost the roof above their head, or to satisfy their hunger, or to quench their thirst. Eat at home one day and donate the money that you would otherwise be using for lavish lunch/dinner. Just imagine the pain that the people must be going through in that corner of the world and keep us in your prayers and thoughts.

Yes Nepal, we will bounce back and we will recover from this. Jai Nepal!!

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Being Vegetarian!!!

"Wait...you don't eat meat... WHYYYY?"

If you are a vegetarian, you will for sure understand the degree of agitation that I have with this question. Every new person that I meet who discovers that I don't meat feels this necessity to know why is it that I don't eat meat. And I am sick and tired of answering this question to every freaking person.

I mean why is it that choosing not to eat meat is like a crime these days? Why is there a necessity for vegetarians to "explain" the reason behind them being one, or whether they've ever tried eating meat before, or the number of years they have been vegetarian for and the likes! This is so frustrating that it is beyond explanation.

To those who eat meat - we get it, meat is delicious.. Trust me, we've heard a lot about it and still we've decided to stand by our preference. The reason behind it should be none of your business. We don't care the reason behind you eating meat, or the number of years that you've ate meat for and the likes. It's your personal preference and we respect that. So please stop bringing that piece of meat near our mouth in the attempt of tempting us. That is honestly more annoying/rude than funny, and gross at times.

I really hate it when people who eat meat constantly try to push the ones who don't to eat meat.

"You're missing out!"
"Just one bite and nobody has to know!"
"Imagine this juicy piece of steak in your mouth.. mmmm!"
"What if I mix some meat in your food, will you know?"
"What life are you living if you're not even eating meat?"

I have been vegetarian since sixth grade which means I have had meat before. As far as I remember, it used to taste good. I am not going to explain here why I quit eating meat. That was my personal preference. But what I can tell you for sure is, that not everyone feels the same way. Maybe your life is all about eating meat. Or maybe eating meat is indeed the secret to all the happiness in the world.. for you, yes! But just because you feel that way doesn't mean everyone else has to or does! Also, as long as nobody forced it on us, you shouldn't be bothered to tempt us into it. If we wanted to, we would be taking that bite of meat before you even bring it near our mouth!

It's just a piece/few pieces of meat. Why don't you just enjoy your share and let others be? As long as nobody is forcing you to stop eating meat, you shouldn't be forcing anybody to eat meat either. So next time you try to convince a vegetarian to eat meat, I hope you will think twice and then shut it like a civilized human being and enjoy the "goodness" that meat has to offer for you! :)

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Being Woman!


5-15:
I want to go outside and play!
"You're insane! Do you think you're a boy?"
"Go get your dolls married."
"Babysit your little brother."
"Go help your mother in the kitchen."
"Why are you sitting with your legs wide open?"
"Learn to be polite."
"Learn some household chores. That will help you in the future, not these books."
"If you behave like how good girls are supposed to, you will be happy in life."
"You're a girl, enough said."

16-25:
I was groped/lurked over/harassed/teased...
"sssshhhhhhhhhh"
"Who told you to go socialize with everyone?"
"Learn how to dress up better."
"Well, you thought men and women could be friends, good lesson learnt eh?"
"Why did you have to go out in the evening?"
"Why did you leave the house at all?"
"That's what happens when you go around provoking men."

I don't want to get married yet or even maybe never!
"You're a woman. You can't afford to wait any longer."
"You're gonna be a burden on your family forever?"
"What else do you want to do then? Aren't you afraid of your future?"
"You need a man to survive in this world."
"hahahahahahaha"

25-35:
I don't want to have kids yet or even maybe never!
"You think you're going to be fertile forever?"
"Are you infertile?"
"That is one thing that you were born to do."
"Wait until your husband finds another wife, then you will know"
"You're selfish and egocentric."
"hahahahahahaha"

My husband cheated on me!
"ssshhhhhhhhh"
"You didn't love him enough."
"That's what happens when you're unable to satisfy your man."
"He still loves you and the kids. That matters more."

My husband died!
"She is a freaking witch who ate up my son."
"Although she is my daughter-in-law, she is like my daughter, so she will stay with us; come help me in the kitchen honey!"
"He wants to marry you even after knowing everything. He comes from a well off family in the city. He will keep you happy!"
*Some money and SOLD!*

What is a woman's worth after all?

These are some of many examples of restrictions a woman has to go through in her lifetime. There could be many more or less compromises made depending on how lucky or unlucky you get. This is the face of the society we live in. Rather than teaching our sons not to rape, we rather teach our daughters to protect themselves. Rather than restricting men from disgusting acts like rapes and domestic violence, we restrict women from going out, living their life, or from their basic rights in general. Most of us may or may not be able to relate to some or all of it, but in the end, this should speak the life of a lot of women world-wide.

Khaled Hosseini quotes in 'A Thousand Splendid Suns', "Like a compass needle that points north, a man's accusing finger always finds a woman. Always". I partially agree to this. I say partially because it is not just men that are good at accusing women; us, women, fail to stand up for each other. It is disappointing to see how easy it is for some women to forget their own worth and believe they come second.

No we don't come second. We are also human beings. We were born the same way and we die the same way. Some physical differences doesn't decide our in-between lifetime. We may perceive things differently but we are definitely not the outcasts. Let's form a pact to have each other's back. Let us not satisfy ourselves with equality in pay rates or a few seats in the parliament. What are they even worth if that doesn't even grant us the respect we deserve? We don't need a man to lead a happy life. I am also not saying, you shouldn't have one. Rather than it being a societal norm, do it for yourself. Don't do it for the sake of other's. Stand up and fight for what you believe in. It may be a tough road ahead, but someone needs to pave that path. For ourselves and for our daughters!

Let "being woman" not be an excuse to carry out heinous crimes or acts of discrimination. Being woman is beautiful. Let us not live a life being disappointed for that reason. Be proud, happy, feisty, aggressive, compassionate, free, independent, and everything of the likes but not ashamed! Be your own strength!!! Happy International Women's Day Ladies! :) 

Friday, March 6, 2015

Being Woman!



5-15:
I want to go outside and play!
"You're insane! Do you think you're a boy?"
"Go get your dolls married."
"Babysit your little brother."
"Go help your mother in the kitchen."
"Why are you sitting with your legs wide open?"
"Learn to be polite."
"Learn some household chores. That will help you in the future, not these books."
"If you behave like how good girls are supposed to, you will be happy in life."
"You're a girl, enough said."

16-25:
I was groped/lurked over/harassed/teased...
"sssshhhhhhhhhh"
"Who told you to go socialize with everyone?"
"Learn how to dress up better."
"Well, you thought men and women could be friends, good lesson learnt eh?"
"Why did you have to go out in the evening?"
"Why did you leave the house at all?"
"That's what happens when you go around provoking men."

I don't want to get married yet or even maybe never!
"You're a woman. You can't afford to wait any longer."
"You're gonna be a burden on your family forever?"
"What else do you want to do then? Aren't you afraid of your future?"
"You need a man to survive in this world."
"hahahahahahaha"

25-35:
I don't want to have kids yet or even maybe never!
"You think you're going to be fertile forever?"
"Are you infertile?"
"That is one thing that you were born to do."
"Wait until your husband finds another wife, then you will know"
"You're selfish and egocentric."
"hahahahahahaha"

My husband cheated on me!
"ssshhhhhhhhh"
"You didn't love him enough."
"That's what happens when you're unable to satisfy your man."
"He still loves you and the kids. That matters more."

My husband died!
"She is a freaking witch who ate up my son."
"Although she is my daughter-in-law, she is like my daughter, so she will stay with us; come help me in the kitchen honey!"
"He wants to marry you even after knowing everything. He comes from a well off family in the city. He will keep you happy!"
*Some money and SOLD!*

What is a woman's worth after all?

These are some of many examples of restrictions a woman has to go through in her lifetime. There could be many more or less compromises made depending on how lucky or unlucky you get. This is the face of the society we live in. Rather than teaching our sons not to rape, we rather teach our daughters to protect themselves. Rather than restricting men from disgusting acts like rapes and domestic violence, we restrict women from going out, living their life, or from their basic rights in general. Most of us may or may not be able to relate to some or all of it, but in the end, this should speak the life of a lot of women world-wide.

Khaled Hosseini quotes in 'A Thousand Splendid Suns', "Like a compass needle that points north, a man's accusing finger always finds a woman. Always". I partially agree to this. I say partially because it is not just men that are good at accusing women; us, women, fail to stand up for each other. It is disappointing to see how easy it is for some women to forget their own worth and believe they come second.

No we don't come second. We are also human beings. We were born the same way and we die the same way. Some physical differences doesn't decide our in-between lifetime. We may perceive things differently but we are definitely not the outcasts. Let's form a pact to have each other's back. Let us not satisfy ourselves with equality in pay rates or a few seats in the parliament. What are they even worth if that doesn't even grant us the respect we deserve? We don't need a man to lead a happy life. I am also not saying, you shouldn't have one. Rather than it being a societal norm, do it for yourself. Don't do it for the sake of other's. Stand up and fight for what you believe in. It may be a tough road ahead, but someone needs to pave that path. For ourselves and for our daughters!

Let "being woman" not be an excuse to carry out heinous crimes or acts of discrimination. Being woman is beautiful. Let us not live a life being disappointed for that reason. Be proud, happy, feisty, aggressive, compassionate, free, independent, and everything of the likes but not ashamed! Be your own strength!!! Happy International Women's Day Ladies! :)  





Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Unanticipated Scar.. #SupportSangitaMagar

"Scars show toughness: that you've been through it, and you're still standing" as quoted by Theo Rossi, some scars do speak stories of bravery. Wounded scars from battlefield, hardships, struggle, etc. indeed show courage and endurance. But how about those unanticipated scars that you neither wanted nor saw it coming? The ones that innocent victim like Sangita has to live for the rest of her life from an unexpected acid attack? The scars reminding her of bravery that she didn't even deserve or have to show in the first place.

I really feel bad for that young girl and a couple of her friends who had to go through this horrific incident. It's surprising to see how some people think it is okay to play with somebody's life like that. I mean what was he thinking? I am not sure what the story/reason is behind this act. There could be millions of either trivial or big reasons behind it; nevertheless, no action in the world deserves such brutal and inhuman crime the offender committed.

It is really saddening to see people from our society being encouraged to copy such negative influences from others. This incident luckily got big attention from the citizens and the media. So hopefully the concerned officials will be compelled to charge the guilty with something bigger than just a few thousands of rupees and a few months of imprisonment. Otherwise, that will just encourage more psychopaths to continue with such crimes.

Here's a sketch of the criminal that the police got, for your reference. Stay alert and do report if you happen to see this criminal around.


Also, here is a link (started by Lex Limbu as a pledge) if you are looking to support Sangita Magar to get through her medical bills.

http://www.gofundme.com/n4prc8?fb_action_ids=854101721302008&fb_action_types=og.shares&fb_ref=undefined

I know many people shun donations. Giving some stranger your hard earned money is understandably tough. But think about all your splurges and maybe you will find something that you could give up for a day? Maybe you could give up a bar of chocolate, a cup of Starbucks coffee, pack your lunch from home instead of eating out, a can of soda, and the like? Something that you can live normally for a day without buying and save that couple of dollars, rupees, pounds... for her. That little something from you could buy her a file of medicine for days. Just think about it!

Don't sweat it if you are absolutely incapable of donating. Keeping her in your prayers for good health is a big support in itself. Spread the word peeps. This criminal needs to be caught and punished so that there won't be anymore Sangitas forced to live a life with scars all over her face and body. Let's raise our voice against it and support Sangita; also through her medical bills if possible!

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Letter from Medical Marijuana: (A Metaphor)

Dear Master,

The day you set me on your bed stand, I knew you were not one of those people who would smoke me up for the wrong reasons. Medical Marijuana, as they have entitled - I have bigger purposes in life. I help the ones in need - those whose pain is greater than the death itself. And I was certain you knew it. For the obvious reason: instead of smoking me up, you chose to set me on your bed stand.

You have always been a healthy person. Hence, I was never a necessity in your life. I have observed that all along. We have seen places together - places that you actually enjoy visiting every now and then; like the clubs or house parties. I enjoy those places as much as you do. We had that in common.  Yet, as always, you never took a puff of me. I was never a bag full of temptation for you. You respected my existence and protected me whenever possible.

There were times when parts of me got stuck in the wrong hands. Yet somehow, like an oasis in a desert, I found my way back to the bed stand, next to you... telling you stories of my suffering and pain. You understood them all because you knew I was a special kind of breed. I was born to help the ones in need. You cussed the abusers with me because you too could feel my pain. You didn't try to help me heal those burnt scars; you knew you wouldn't be able to do it. Nevertheless, you kept me by your side. You never questioned the circumstances or the times I spent in those wrong hands either. All that mattered to you was me setting myself free from those dirty hands.

This went on for years and years. There were times when I wouldn't even see you everyday; yet when you came back it would be like you never left. 

My trust in you started elevating by day, because you never lusted over me. I knew you didn't need me. Like I said, in my eyes you were a healthy individual and in your eyes I was a bag of magic that belonged to a special someone. Someone, whose life would be miserable without me. And someone, who would actually understand my worth.

That was until that day you gave me that look. For the first time, I could see a different kind of pain in your eyes; pain that had a hint of temptation. It seemed like you needed me. I couldn't quite understand why. That is something that I still don't understand. Maybe you needed me to distract your mind from that unfaithful lover who deserted you. Or maybe you needed a distraction from your mundane life filled with nothing but work. There could be many reasons that I may or may not even know. However, what I know for sure is, you didn't actually need me. You could be doing fine without me.

What took me by surprise was the way I started falling prey of your addiction. I felt like I was healing you in one way or another. I grew accustomed to the ecstasy that you got every time some bits of me burnt. Then suddenly, you were able to be up on your own. I seemed to be useless. Maybe it was because your once unfaithful lover found a way back to your life. Or maybe because you got back the thrill you wanted from life. There could be million of reasons that I may or may not even know. Hence, I was no longer a muse in your life. Instead of bed stand though, you shoved me into a dark corner this time. Maybe because you couldn't face me anymore. Or maybe you just didn't care about my existence anymore. There could be a million of reasons that I may or may not even know.

What disappoints me the most is, in the end, like those wrong hands, you used me as well. You used me to fill an empty void resulted from the stress/life you couldn't handle. Then when I got used to your addiction, you shoved me in the corner. Worst part is, I never saw it coming from you. So I am running away from you now, gathering up the bits and pieces that you haven't burnt up yet. I am sure me running away will go unnoticed. But I am leaving for my own sake. I still believe that someday I will make it to the rightful owner and serve my purpose. I hope your memories of betrayal will be burnt down into those parts of me that you lit up and turned into ashes. Stay happy my dear master, I hope to never see or hear from you again! :)

Sunday, February 8, 2015

V-day tribute to the side kick!

With Valentine's Day being just around the corner, how could I miss the opportunity to celebrate love? Love is beautiful indeed. With so much love raining in every street and store around the globe, it would be harsh to post a rant against love. Not saying that I want to anyway! ;) Nevertheless, this post is also not going to be a tribute to the "beloved" or that special someone that the whole idea of V-day is dedicated to. This tribute is rather to that person who is as involved in the special relationship and giving suggestions and ideas all along.

To be honest, my initial thought was to write a tribute to that special kind of love and write about it's glory. Taking a deeper thought into it made me realize who would actually be deserving of the tribute more than the special beloved. I am not sure if it works the same way for our guy friends, but for us ladies - behind every successful or unsuccessful relationship, there has to be a best friend (or two or more) involved in that relationship as much. Not in a creepy way of course. This can however, come in handy to guy friends who are dating girls with a side kick (chic) tagged along! ;)

This person, BFF, best friend, best buddy, or however you would like to address, is an integral part of any relationship. From the first time you find someone attractive, to the first time you start texting that person, to the first date, to the first movie together, to first fight, and many more of these firsts, seconds, thirds.... that you can think of, this person knows each and every detail about the relationship. This person gets almost every screenshot of the conversation that's worth discussing about. This person gets every detail about all the intimacy going on between two people in a relationship. Yupp, transparency is the key here. Dear men, think twice before you text your lady something controversial the next time! ;)

Yes I am talking about the Meredith to Christina kind of friendship, (if you watch Grey's Anatomy) who makes any relationship worth being in. As someone who has been in the worst possible kind of relationships you can think of, I can't imagine going though them without my two special best friends. I am blessed to have these two confidantes in my life. These people are those that have celebrated the bliss of relationship during happy days and also helped pick the shattered pieces & glue them back together after the wreck. 

So I would like to raise a toast to my two best friends and all these wonderful women out there helping their friends either be in a relationship or get out of the messy ones. "Besides, what friends are for, if they can't pick up the pieces a man has left behind" as Emily Giffin quotes in Baby Proof, I can't agree more to this. We all do need that special person who will cherish our happy days and wipe our tears during the darker days in any relationship. Have a wonderful Valentine's Day everyone!

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Rape Part 2: Answers to some absurd arguments made!

Part 1: http://snout2013.blogspot.com/2015/01/today-i-feel-like-getting-raped.html

I would like to start out by thanking all the supporters who took time out to read and share my blogpost “Today I feel like getting raped”. That being said, I am writing this to clear confusion, for a portion of my readers and address their issues/concerns with my writing/content. If it was some petty issue, I would have overlooked it – there are times when people hold different opinion about different subject matters. However, rape doesn't fall under that category. It’s a crime, period! I am not sure how people can hold difference in opinion about this issue.

The first issue addressed by many was the title of the article as well as the sarcasm of the story. This is an acceptable argument made. In my defense, previously, I'd written an article on the same issue with a clear title and blatantly just raged against the crime. It didn't get much attention. You know why? People from all over the world have stated facts against rapes and made similar arguments. I don’t think anyone has ever dared to start out by saying “Today I feel like getting raped”. It was a bold move. Although hesitant, I knew people would be intrigued by the title and I wanted my words to be heard!

About the use of sarcasm, it was my way of tightly slapping the officials who set those guilty criminals free based on the ground of lacking evidence. In the story the girl starts out by having a thought about getting raped. Do you think these innocent girls when walking out of their house know what lies ahead of them? NO! It is something unexpected. So you can’t expect the victims to have solid evidences. In such a conservative society, isn't the victim coming out and sharing their horror stories and bruises enough of an evidence? That is what I wanted people to understand through sarcasm. Also, twisted words tend to intrigue the brain, that's my belief!

Moving on, someone argued that I was “one of those wannabe sluts from the West bringing out old beaten up argument”. I don’t even know where to start from. Firstly, if this person had asked me if I wanted to be a slut, I would have said no. Wannabe is something you want to/are trying to be and no I don’t want to be a slut so change your label. Sure, I might sound like a - wannabe blogger? Wannabe writer? Wannabe woman activist? I am not sure where you drew that "slutty" impression from. Check your facts before labeling someone, okay? Cool! “From the West?”. Just because I am not currently in Nepal doesn’t mean you get to outcast me by calling my argument from the West. I belong to the same country and I have as much of the right to share my thoughts as you do about my country. And nowhere in my post had I mentioned anything about USA. It is a simple story that happens in Nepal, why would that be called an argument from West?? And again, regarding the old beaten up arguments, well these are going to continue unless we can minimize the case of rape and/or do something to control it if not eradicate. I am not even sorry if that bothers you.. I along with many other concerned citizens will keep raising their voice, deal with it, sir!

Then someone pointed out that holding grudges against the rapists is not right. He thinks forgiving and moving on leads to a peaceful and joyful nation. He also pointed out that these rapists need love and we need to understand that. To this person, I just have one question. If someday (I hope never), your daughter/wife/sister comes up to you after getting raped and begs you to join her in her fight, would you be able to look in her eyes and tell her, “Honey, it’s okay - that guy needed love. You need to forgive that person by understanding his situation. He needed love, so let it go and move on."? If yes, then I have nothing more to tell you! The only thing you missed to understand is that a peaceful and joyful nation is when all the citizens, regardless of their age, sex, gender, religion, and similar factors can live with no fear. Speaking in this context, they should be able to live their life without the fear of being pulled to a dark alley and getting raped!

The whole point of me writing this is to rage against this portion of population who just can’t accept the fact that rape is happening and it is indeed a crime. There were people giving me numbers on how rate of rape in USA is greater so I am at greater risk. When did I even say I wanted to talk about USA. You're comparing apples to oranges here. Either way, my concern is about the situation in Nepal. There are citizens from USA to address their issue here, let's re-direct our focus to our own country okay? We can help USA later if it is what you want! Also this is what is wrong with the society. Until and unless we don’t stop the finger-pointing and accept our own fault, we will never be able to move forward.

Then there were people pointing out how intelligent and smart women don’t wear revealing cloths. A fully naked stripper standing next to these people, any day, would look and sound way smarter than these people making such absurd arguments. And I am sure they are for a fact! Why should anyone be ashamed to wear cloths according to their preference? Also if clothing is the issue then the rapists must have eyes equipped with x-rated vision to see through normal tshirt and jeans?!?

This issue just boils my blood to the extremes. How and why are we even making rape a controversial issue? Rape is a crime, enough said! People going around making excuses for the rapists and playing the blame game is why rape is increasing by day! "A kid threw banana skin on the street- a woman slipped and fell in front of me- I gave her my hand- Our touch sparked me up- I had been looking for love for quite some time- This spark made it clearer I could be loved right now- I pulled her to a nearby alley and hence it happened- oops"?! Yeah, this is the kind of slippery slope fallacy that we are making. It’s neither the kid’s fault nor the woman’s. Don’t blame the situation and the victim - rather blame the criminal’s inadequacy to control his urge and provide justice accordingly.. Amen!

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Today I feel like getting raped!

This was just a usual morning for me, yet it started out with an unusual urge- Maybe I should get raped today? I go into the kitchen and help my mom prepare breakfast/lunch while my dad and brother get some extra hours of sleep before starting their days. Well, I am a woman and so is my mother, if we won’t run the kitchen, who else will? So, should I tell my mom about this urge? Hmmm maybe not... what if I don’t get raped? Let me just see how the day goes by. She can wait until tonight when I come home.

Finally household chores are done and I am getting ready to go to work. I pick a pink top and black pants to wear. I hope this will provoke someone to rape me. It doesn't reveal much of my skin, but hey, my sole existence as a woman should be a good enough reason to provoke few men, if not all. With these jumbled up thoughts running wild in my brain, I take a bus. It is crowded but I am almost running late. Also, I can’t afford to take a Taxi. Either way, since I am looking to get raped, why even bother anyway?

I push my way through and stand sandwiched between a middle-aged woman and an elderly man. I was 7 stops away from my destination. Suddenly I feel the man’s hand on my butt. I turn around to glare at him and he just flashes me a toothless grin. He reminds me of my grandfather. His groping doesn't stop. I try to push his hand away but he’s just too resistant. Also, it's my fault that my butt was in his way - I chose to place my butt near him. Man this feels good, my butt is being felt by a strange man who is almost as old as my grandfather. This is normal right? To my utter disappointment, he got off after 3 stops and hence, loneliness?

So I get to work and my day goes by as every other normal day. Mr. Sharma, my boss, is in a good mood today. Unlike every other day, today he decided not to blatantly point out my inadequacy to perform certain task being a woman. Neither did he pull out his favorite “Go get me my sandwich” joke on me. My work area consists of two group of male coworkers: the nice group who mind their own business and treat you like a normal coworker and the other group that think women belong in the kitchen, obviously.. and also they have this power of raping with their eyes. I put up with everything just like every other woman working there. In a male dominated society, you either get fired or just learn to put up with that bullshit. But I am not complaining at all. I am a woman, I know where my place is!

I had to work until late so Mr. Sharma offers me a ride back home. I have worked with him for 2 years now and if he is in one of those happy days, he doesn't mind doing people favors. So I accept his invitation and get in his car. He was being nice to me for a change. We are about fifteen minutes away and he suddenly takes an exit away from my home. It is confusing. He stops somewhere which looks like a middle of nowhere. I try to get out but the doors are already locked. I am trapped in and before I could even realize that his hands are on my thighs and then everywhere else. My protests are all going in vain. He rapes me; then he threatens to fire me and destroy my life if I dare open my mouth. I feel two tight slaps on my face marking an end to his act. Finally he drops me home.

Well the urge is all over. I was looking to get raped and I did. Now my next step is to go to the police station and report about it so that I can announce to the world that I got raped. Hence, I did. No-brainer, I was asked for evidence. Tsk Tsk Tsk.. I am so stupid. I left the house in the morning with that determination of getting raped but foolishly forgot to grab a camera or recorder to capture that moment. I also forgot to bring along a friend or passerby to observe the moment. That moment that I would like to remember and cherish for the rest of my life. Every court I go to, I have to explain every little detail. Every reporters I meet, want to know the details. I get interviewed and people want to know the detail. Everybody freaking wants to know every single thing that happened! Because hey, if I don’t tell the world the detailed description of this story of mine, how will they ALL believe me?

Due to lack of enough evidence, (and a lot of money) Mr. Sharma is set free. Now he is going to fire me for sure. About the society - since I lost the case, I was definitely the one who provoked him or wanted a promotion which is why the whole thing happened. My father didn't really want to support me in the first place because of his “status” in the society. Also in his eyes, I have always been a rebel wanting to go to school, get a job, and you know those things that women shouldn't be doing. After all we were born to run the kitchen and raise kids, WTH was I even thinking? My mother lives in the fear of never being able to find me a good husband now. And me? Well, I asked for the rape and I provoked Mr. Sharma and I was the one to somehow forget to collect evidence so maybe I made a mistake? I am sorry, dear society, for seeking justice and letting you down! I wish I had that camera or a witness!

This is a hypothetical and sarcastic story that I wrote as a tribute to Pooja Karki, Pooja Bohara, (recent victims) and many other innocent girls being raped almost every day. They are fighters in my eyes. Hearing their story is enough to give me goosebumps! If somehow, they could read this, I just wanted to let them know that they are not alone in this fight. This new constitution definitely needs stricter laws against the rapists. If these monsters get to live a good life after destroying somebody else’s, then about time we raise a question in humanity! If we don’t stop blaming the victim and setting the guilty people free, incidents like these will just keep escalating.

Share this and show support to these girls. Spread the word peeps, domestic violence, abuse, and gender-based discrimination needs to come to an end!


Sunday, January 18, 2015

An undelivered speech!

Let me start out by shamelessly admitting a truth. The day I submitted my graduation application form, I was secretly hoping I would be asked to deliver a speech during the pinning ceremony for International students. To my utter disappointment, that opportunity I was looking for, was given to two other International students for that ceremony. And fortunate or unfortunate enough for you guys, I decided to post this article.

I had gone over the speech quite a few times in my head and a couple of times in front of my bathroom mirror. I happen to be one of those people who get excited about speaking or sharing experiences in general. What I had planned to deliver that night was to share my experience; as an International student who spent four and half years of my life in a strange land, working on getting that degree. And here I am today, vaguely drafting that speech with a wine glass (and/or a bottle :P) on my hand, ready to raise a toast.

Looking back, I have definitely grown into a different individual. I look four years back, I was a young, dependent girl trying to fit into a new culture. My goals in life were different. Classes were easier, realistic world had not started kicking in yet. To break it down in simpler terms, understanding the American accent and finding on-campus job had to be the hardest struggles of all. Then I look two years back. A not-so-young, semi-independent woman lost in self conflict; and not to forget desperately wanting to graduate out of college. Figuring out what I wanted to do in life versus what was expected out of me. Realistic complications had started to kick in. Paying bills, figuring out classes, and balancing social & academic life were the biggest struggles of all.

And here I am today. Not-young-anymore, independent (almost), self-proclaimed blogger ;), and an unemployed woman surrounded by nothing but the real-world complications. Looking back, I frequently question my two-years-back self’s desperation to graduate out of college. Graduating out of college looks glitter and gold unless you are the one taking that walk down the stage to get that diploma. I am not saying it is the worst thing to happen but I am also not saying that it is the best thing of all to be worthy of that desperation. You can always slow down and take your time and get that degree in a right pace. I have seen people eager to graduate out of college just two years into it.

So today, when I have finally learnt to drink socially rather than drinking to get drunk (hopefully), I would like to raise a toast to those glorious four and half-ish years I spent in college to get my undergraduate degree. I have fallen down, gotten up, loved, lost, been broke enough to feed myself on ramen noodles, been rich enough to indulge myself on getting a gel-based manicure ;)(waste of money), procrastinated like a hare, and worked my butt off like crazy all these years. As I received that diploma on the D-day, I realized I was walking out with no regrets. There might have been things I did that I am not proud of today, but then again I always did what I wanted to do.

So to all the fellas who recently graduated out of college, let’s pat ourselves in the back for all the hard works we did. Having many dreams shattered right in front of our eyes and learning to rebuild new dreams picking up those shattered pieces, we have come a long way! The real world awaits for us now. Life may seem challenging, darker, difficult, and impossible; but always remember, as they say, “The fool didn’t know it was impossible, so he did it”.