Relationship 101 for dummies!

The title of this post in itself made me chuckle if not laugh out loud. As someone who has had a series of failed relationships, I would be the last person giving anyone relationship advice. So I am sorry, if I fooled you with the title but this post is definitely not for you if you are looking for tips on making relationship last. Having said that though, what I am actually going to talk about today is the importance of finding out whether or not you are relationship-ready!

Relationships are great to be in, well for most people. The first few weeks or months are undoubtedly the best for almost all. To add to that, these days the peer pressure of being in relationship is so high that even the typical South Asian parents have started giving up on the idea of arranged marriage. Then there are romantic and all different sort of movies that have hyped-up the bliss of being in relationship. All these factors have led into the idea of being in a relationship turn into a trend.. something like owning a newly launched iPhone or that skinny jeans in trend. Everyone wants to have it just so they can flaunt it.

I have noticed that there are some people who are not at all relationship ready and yet getting into one just for that reason.. handful of people like me! Talking about me, relationship is actually not a top priority on my list; yet I try to make it to the top.. just because! When I get in a relationship, I have the tendency of putting my heart and soul into it to the point of going crazy. I have done all different sort of stuff to make that relationship last just for the sake of being in that relationship. Coming to think of it, I happen to be one of those people who is not relationship ready at all!

I have cooked meat being someone who has been vegetarian for years and vowed to never touch meat again, I have spent money that I didn't have, I have given up on eating and drinking certain food/drink for the obvious reasons. These are just a list of few things of many that I tried so as to keep that relationship going. Recalling about them all, what hit me is, being in a relationship is like a chore for me.. it doesn't come naturally. I have to always go above and beyond to keep it going. It seems like a chore maybe because it is not exactly what I want but I feel like I do.

I have bigger dreams in life. I want to be remembered someday. I want to be somebody when I leave this world and that is my top priority. I have desires to achieve so many things in life and when it comes to such stuff, I have my shit together.. for real! Excuse me if I sound arrogant, but when I say I am more intellectual than some men that I dated in the past, I mean it. Maybe I am the intimidating one in the relationship which is why it never last? Maybe I am too confident for my own good?

So the whole point of me writing this is to let people like me know that it is okay if you are not relationship-ready yet. I have noticed that relationships have always brought out the worst in me and yet I kept trying because maybe I wanted to be good at it. So it's okay if you feel like you're not too. You can take a step down on that aspect in life and focus on something that you actually care about. You have planned a future for yourself that only you acknowledge and if being in relationship is not first on the list then it's okay to let it go and work on whatever is more important at the moment. Relationship will come find you when you are actually ready for it! :)